Halloween

Today for Halloween, I was a Malagasy woman.

Androany tsy vazah aho fa vavi Malagasy.
Today I am not a white person/foreigner but I am a Malagasy woman.

No picture. You can choose whatever image you like :)

Love,
~Sarah

"I'm still here..."

The Lutheran Malagasy Church service is very different than any other service I have experienced. Let me just give you a couple highlights:

 - There are between 10 – 12 hymns each service

 - For offering, people walk up to the alter to put money in the baskets rather than remaining seated

- Communion is taken kneeling down at the altar

- Everyone dresses to the nines – no matter what the style is, or even if the clothes fit accurately

 - Sometimes if the church is too full, people sit on benches outside. I’m not sure if they can even hear what’s going on inside, but they still show up.

 - Announcements are given after the sermon. And they can last anywhere from 15 minutes to an hour.

 - Sometimes there’s food being sold outside of church. People typically leave during  announcements to take a little walk, go to the bathroom, or have a snack outside. In some churches people even snack inside the church as well.

With all of that, it usually takes about 3 hours to get through everything. The longest I’ve experienced was 3 and a half. One time church was only 1 hr 15 min and I didn’t know what to do with myself – I was baffled. I didn’t even need to break out the snacks I had stashed in my purse.

Although church is in Malagasy, I have a translation sheet to follow along with. And I have a small Bible that I bring to understand the readings. But other than that, I’m lost. I usually understand about 4 words every hour. You do the math.

There was one particular Sunday where the church was PACKED full. It was extremely hot and the fan in the choir loft wasn’t on. The thin wooden benches were beginning to get very uncomfortable after the 2^nd hour and I was getting hungry because I didn’t bring any snacks or money for food (what was I thinking!). I was beginning to think “why am I even sitting here? I don’t understand ANYTHING! What good am I doing taking up space here?” I told God my complaints of the situation I was in and after I was done complaining, I felt the whisper of God say

“I’m still here.”

And then I laughed. And cried. I had nothing to say in response.

I was humbled by that simple statement. “I’m still here”. Yes, church is going to be frustrating at times. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to it or ever not be uncomfortable in some way. But that doesn’t mean that God isn’t there. Hundreds of Malagasy show up to this church because of their faithfulness to their God. The least I can do is join them in their worship space. That’s what accompaniment is all about, right? Walking together, whether or not I have a clue about what is going on.

And it’s not only in Church that I get this reminder of “I’m still here.” Especially when I’m having a challenging day with things that are out of my control (aka cyber cafes and everything that is French), God gives me a little light through the people around me to say “Hey! Vazah! (white person) You need to chill out and look at the beautiful people around you. Appreciate them and get over yourself.” So although I often fail, I am reminded of God’s grace and the love and care He has for me and His people.

So even though I have new insight to church, I’ll finally be going to the first English speaking church service this Sunday. Halleluiah!

Love ya, mean it!

~Sarah

 

 

 

Being Vulnerable

The first time I cried here was about two weeks into country orientation. It wasn't because I was sad or upset, I just finally, what I call, "let my body become vulnerable to the spirit".

So I found a piano at the retreat-like-center where we were staying and after about 15 minutes of crying and writing, I recorded a song on my ipod. I don't consider myself a "song writer" I just happen to write out my feelings and "match" them with a tune. Especially at night time, when it's just my guitar and my thoughts...

And now that I've been at my placement for three weeks, I find myself understanding and relating to the song I wrote a month ago more than I had before. I'm not one to put my music out there very much - but I guess this song basically sums up a lot that I've been going through and where my heart has been.

If you don't like it, that's fine.

It's not meant for you to like. It's just meant for you to get a better understanding of my spirit.

So here it is.

It's time to let go. It's time to be free.
It's time to open your heart. And let your mind be. 

It's time to breathe again. And let your body break. 
It's time to open the flood gates and make some mistakes.

Stretch out your arms now and learn to fall. 
Take in one more breath and wait for the call. 

It's time to laugh. It's time to wander.
It's time to let your soul soar amongst the thunder. 

Let your heart be open to what it needs to do.
Stop thinking and listen to what the spirit is telling you. 

It's time to let go. It's time to be free.
It's time to be challenged to who you're called to be. 

Stretch out your arms now and trust the fall.  

"Eny Ary." That's all.
~Sarah

Saotra Saotra Jeso

Womens centers are pretty common in Madagascar. It's a place where women come from all over the country to learn trades like baking, sewing, cooking, textiles, etc. and they bring their knowledge back to their home village/town/city. The women staying here now are around 18 yrs old and there's only about 4-6 of them (more will come throughout the year). Although they don't speak much english, it's so easy to be out with them. I hung out with them during pastry class a couple times, which consists of a lot of dancing and laughing and when they invited me to sewing class, I ended up making a skirt!

The other day they asked me to have lunch with them. How could I say no?? The started singing a prayer for lunch and after a few notes I realized I knew the song! They were singing "Saotra saotra Jeso" which means "Thank you Thank you Jesus"!!! Thats the song my family sings before meals!!!!

I hummed the harmony and held back my tears as my heart was pounding. As soon as they finished singing, I explained to them how I knew the song. And then I taught it to them in English. They could tell I was beaming because someone said "Faly be ianao!" ("You are very happy!"). "Yes! Yes I am! Thank you for singing that song." To them, it was just another song. To me, it was so much more. And now I sing it with my new family.

Saotro Saotro Jeso

Saotro Saotro Jeso

Saotro Saotro Jeso any fo

Saotro Saotro Jeso

Saotro Saotro Jeso

Saotro Saotro Jeso any fo

Thank you Thank you Jesus, in my heart. Thank you for the opportunity to connect with these beautiful women and to share love and music with them. Amen

Sarah 

Making New Friends

Hi, my name is Sarah and I'm an extrovert. To me, that means I get energy from being around a lot of people. But when I arrived at my placement, there was a lot of alone time, or one-on-one time in the first couple weeks. Not saying that I don't love "me time" but it started getting a bit lonely. I realized I needed to make friends.

At first I just wanted to sit on a street corner with a sign that said
"Help needed! Does anyone want to be my friend? I don't speak French, but I can help you practice English." I figured that wouldn't be the most productive way of making friends... and I didn't have any cardboard.

So I decided to take initiative and introduce myself to people-starting in my "back yard". There's a family who lives at Ilofav (the women's center where I live) and they have a son named Fetra who likes to practice guitar outside on their balcony, which is just an ear shot away from my window. He doesn't know, but his "practicing" was very comforting and soothing, especially in my first few days here. So finally I got up the nerve to introduce myself. I asked if I could play with him and he said yes. After showing him the little guitar I knew, I said:

"Could you teach me guitar and I teach you English?"
"I think that is a good idea" he said.

Guitar lessons AND a new friend! Win!!!

I also found great peace and rejuvination while going for walks in the community. Although I live in the capitol of Madagascar, I'm in an area that isn't to busy and allows for some stress-free exploring. On these walks, I've found it helpful to make firends with the kids (ankizi). This is for several reasons - because they (the kids) and me most likely have the same maturity level and they are not afraid to speak slowly and even "yell" words at me when I don't understand what they're saying. But I also like making friends with them beacuse they're just ADORABLE! And sometimes when I'm out walking, they'll yell my name just to say hello and golly gee I get so excited to see them!

"Namana kely vaovao!" My new little friends! We don't speak the same lanugage but I try theirs and they try mine. But it doesn't really matter what we're saying anyways, we're just happy to know each other.

I look forward to growing in relationship and making even more friends with the beautiful people of Madagascar. Here's hopin...