Mada Wedding

 



I feel so grateful that I’ve been able to experience two Malagasy weddings since being here. Both very different in so many ways, but this most recent one will forever have an imprint in my heart.

The bride, Hoby (pronounced Hoo-bee), is a seamstress/sewing teacher here at ILOFAV (the women’s center where I live) as well as a former student. She was the instructor when I made my skirt here in the first few weeks of my arrival. She is such a loving person with a generous and thoughtful heart. And I was so flattered when she invited me to her wedding and she even said I could bring a plus date (aka – my Tana Buddy, Lee Kirberg)!

As the days led up to the wedding, everyone who lived or worked at ILOFAV helped out. On Thursday, we worked on the decorations. The teachers, the women students, and even the guards were involved. Thursday night a bus full of Hoby’s family members came. I was overwhelmed and excited to see the 20+ people file out of the van. The energy that stepped off of that bus was contagious. Despite the riders having been in said vehicle for nearly 12 hours, they couldn’t contain their joy.  I got a little misty eyed thinking about my beautiful family back home and what it would be like to take a 12 hour road trip with them to attend a family member’s wedding! (Just as long as I get to sit next to Mary, I would never be bored!)

Friday afternoon was cooking day! It was incredible to see all the different stations going on. People were making cake, chopping veggies, de-feathering the geese, and so many other things I couldn’t keep track of. I was told that things were starting at 4. When I arrived, they were already cleaning the geese. I look at that sad figure starring at me and thought to myself “AAAAWWW MAAAN!!! IIII wanted to kill a goose!” I told them that in Malagasy and they all thought it was hilarious.

Cake

Chicken

Geese

My feather coat... just kidding.

 

That night one of the YAGMs, Kate, was spending the night on her way back from visiting other YAGM volunteer, Hannah, in Mahajanga. As soon as she arrived, she was peeling pineapple and cutting up green peppers. Kate has such a giving heart so even though she had just gotten off a 11h hour taxibus ride, she was willing to help out.

Seeing everyone in the community chip in their time and effort to help their teacher, family member, and friend was so beautiful to me! I was awe-struck at all the love that was being put into this celebration.

The day of the wedding, the three of us (Kate, Lee, and I) taught my Saturday morning class and came back with just enough time to change and walk to church. However, the family and close friends of the bride were all standing around the courtyard of ILOFAV waiting for her to come out of the main house. The wedding was supposed to start at 10:30am… she walked out of the house at 10:45. “Madalife”. She went into a decked out car and as soon as she got in, there were about 30 of us who piled into a bus. Lee, Kate and I were more than willing to take the 8 minute walk to the church, but everyone insisted that we ride in the bus. So we did.

Lovin the bus

 

Then the three of us had to dip out of the ceremony early to drop Kate off at the airport to fly back to Toliara (a two day drive or a 1.5 hour flight).  By the time Lee and I came to the reception, it had already started and there wasn’t any more room for us. We went down near the kitchen to the “kids table” where all the children, the students, and helpers were. I was totally stoked for the kids table but then someone came down and told us they made room for us and told us we needed to sit by the grownups. Although the “grown up room” was a lot tamer than the “kid’s room”, I was fortunate enough to have a partner in crime with me as we spoke our “secret language” i.e. – English!
 

Kid's table/room



Adult room

They had a keyboard player and singer during the meal and after we finished our rice, Pastor Rene (mama’s husband, the pastor at the church, and my joking buddy) told Lee and me that we were going to sing for everyone. My first thought was “Don’t gotta tell ME twice!” Two minutes later we were jamming out to “What a Wonderful World”. Unfortunately, that is undocumented. You’ll just have to imagine how awesome it was!

I was told the day before that there would be a dance and the reception would last until 10pm. I was really excited to get my grove on -Malagasy style! We kept waiting for a dance to happen, but it never did. One of my students and friends at ILOFAV, Lanto, told me that Pastora said they couldn’t have a dance. By 7pm, most people were leaving and they were taking the speakers away. Needless to say I was very disappointed – but I tried not to make a big deal about it. We took some photos and hung out a bit before everyone started dispersing.





Somebody told us to wear these hats... so we did

The bride Hoby and me

 

 

 

At 9:30pm there was a knock on my door. It was one of the guards. He told me that there was a dance but we had to be quiet and we couldn’t tell the pastor! I was thrilled! I come down to the dining room and there were only about 25 people there – just family and close friends remained… and the best part - everyone was in their PAJAMAS! It was like a secret dance party and it was BEAUTIFUL! Everyone was exhausted from all the work they’d done during the past few days, but they still held the adrenaline and excitement that comes with a loved one getting married! Hoby and her husband were there too. Her hair was still fabulous, but she had changed into more comphy clothes. It was a perfect way to end a lovely wedding - Dancing in pajamas late at night with the people who mean the most. So Special. And I got to break it down – Malagasy style!

Unfortunately for you, there aren’t any pictures of the secret dance party because, well, it was a secret dance party. :-)
 

After the dancing, I was tired but so full of life. I felt like I participated in something so rare and beautiful that weekend.

The food wasn’t catered - it was purchased and prepared by family and friends.

The reception wasn’t in a grand hall - It was located in the room where Hoby spent countless hours learning and teaching the art of sewing.

There wasn’t a DJ - it was a small set of speakers and a list of songs chosen by the closest friends and family members.

This wedding has been one of the highlights of my time here in Madagascar. Everything about it – the before, during, and after - was done with intention and love. It was so inspiring to witness and be a part of something so special.  

When I grow up, I want to be just like her!